Wafaoon ki hum say tawwaqu nahi hai

Drowned in sheets of
feathery confusion
in a twilight zone confounded
by a hollow abyss
fears come alive,
reaching out to touch
lips.

Panicked
cliched goldfish gasping
for water

to me, you are perfect
and i say this
without hope or agenda
my wasted heart
will go on loving you
(love actually)

This may be blog infidelity, but I have a blog on wordpress. About Cairo. InshaAllah updates there may be more frequent later on in the year.

I really want to mush them all together and just use the nifty labels to differ in the categories...but I'm not ready to leave this one yet...
If you read this one, then you'll know about that one. But not vice versa, which is semi-important.

Anyhow...Here are some pictures of my apple pie endeavors. Not as great as my tiramisu, and again I'm banned from creating more fattening foods, but you have to have something to go with chai ;)

Mmmm, apples in a pie crust...

The mess I made...

Ready for the oven

Give me some pie!

My first attempt at making tiramisu turned out much better than I expected. We finished off an 11 by 13 pan in just two days. My mother's warned me though, I'm not allowed to make it again for a long time otherwise we'll all become fatties =S

I spend so much time writing drafts. Some of them I write in lighting speed, and realizing that the grammar, mechanics, spelling are not up to English teacher par, I never get around to editing them. I know all the other posts aren't perfect either, but most of them can be read well enough to understand what's going on.
Maybe bullet points will be more effective in getting all this down:

1. {edited}
2. I'm burning through tealight candles like there's no tomorrow. I really like the musky or jean paul gauntier (complete with a french accent) smell, especially before bed. Except when it becomes too strong its kind of suffocating.
3. I can swim!! Alhamdulillah. After 3 weeks of noodles, floaties, boats, tubes, and my personal favorite the purple air mat, I can float and swim with my head above water or completely submerged. I hated putting my head underwater for some reason for the first two weeks, but now that I can swim underwater, I prefer it 100 times over swimming with my head over water. in the deep end too!!
4. I'm baking lots of brownies. It's a constant bake sale to raise funds for my trip. I will overnight brownies (marshmallow fudge, walnut, chewy, chunky, you name it) ! =D
5. I'm selling my Touched by an Angel CD set, Under the shade of Scrolls (Muhammad al-shareef), and History of the Quran (Isam Rajab), and my complete Tafsir Ibn Kathir at very reasonable prices...and probably better than Amazon or half.com
6. 25 more days...ah.

Ever since my online astronomy class a couple years ago, I've really liked looking at the stars. I can't identify many of them and don't know much of the science behind it, but the few facts that I can remember are enough to have me oo-ing and aah-ing and getting a cramp in my neck. I suppose I could do that even before an astronomy class, but I've come to appreciate them and their Creator so much more. Really its because a little tiny miniscule understanding of the universe just opens you up to realizing how incredibly vast it is, and how incredibly tiny we are, and the Incredibleness of Allah.
Someday, I'll be outside where there aren't any other lights...other than the stars. I'll have someone I feel very safe with near me. =D Then I'll be able to see a whole sky full of stars and I'll find Orion's belt, jupiter, polaris, casiopia, and the big dipper. InshaAllah
The fact that I remember the most is that the light that we see from the stars is actually billions of years old! That's how long it takes for it to reach our eyes from wherever in the universe they are. That totally changes the perspective of time being "here and now" and the future.

If tears could fix problems...
we could cry until they were all gone...

instead
with heavy choked lumps of
sad
in our throats

wishing, praying, hoping
resisting despair

problems that aren't even "mine", but they are "ours" because this isn't about me or you. The heart strings are tied, taut under my rib on my flesh to under yours and on yours. Turning my head away from you to spare myself the sight of the problems doesn't stop the hemorrhaging, the painful, jerking tug to get my attention again to watch our problems, our wreckage...

I keep making drafts starting off topics, some in regards to the current situation in Pakistan, which we are continiuously watching at my house (thanks Geo news) and others in regards to the censorship of the media itself which happened only a few weeks ago in Pakistan. Although these topics have brought Pakistanis to the forefront of the "fanatical extremist islamofascists" list, I wanted to write about another topic that hit home personally. Gorgeous is gone, and if you've ever had a cat you might know what it feels like. That innocent, pure, unconditional love could be the topic of an entry, but really I'd have to be able to verbalize that, which maybe I will later.

I heard something today that struck me. What if you knew with certainty of sight (of hellfire and jannah)? You saw the blaze and the gardens? What would you do differently in your life?
Yet if we wait to see them before we change anything, then it will certainly be too late.

My big little girl heart
is full of
happy wide world hopes
5.23

My students evaluated my teaching on the following 6 statements. 1= Never, 2 = Rarely, 3= Most of the time, 4= Always. The number is the average of 119 responses.

She knew what she was talking about and the information she gave was accurate. 3.307
She was always friendly. 3.384
She was always professional. 3.410
She was approachable and available to answer any questions i had. 3.119
She was fair when grading my papers. 3.068
I learned something while she was teaching. 3.128

Here are some of their comments from the evaluations:

She was always professional and always knew what she was talking about
Ms. Z let us be creative and I really enjoyed having her in our class.
She was a great teacher.
I enjoyed having Ms. Z as a student teacher and I think she will be a wonderful teacher.
Good person
She was hard
too many major grades
pass her
Ms. Z was really good. I enjoyed having her!
Ms. Z was awesome.
I really liked having Ms. Z as our student teacher.
She is the pwnage
She was polite and treated us with Respect!
She made my grade drop almost 20 pts.
She talked to fast and never explained herself
I didn't understand her
I did not like her
1001
Ms. Z is going to be a great teacher, I wish there were more teachers like her.
Thanks for teaching me!
muy bueno
I loved Ms. Z! She was so awesome
She is really sweet and a very good teacher!!
Ms. Z will be a good teacher. Just Chillax!
My average went down about 15 pts.

I'd like to say forgive me
for not thinking this through
some things won't wait
for the right words to string together
and the fabric I'm weaving doesn't
look the right color, but I know that its
softer than anything you've ever felt
before.

Here they come,
the words that have been building themselves up
creating the right little layers of sensation...

Dear Hersheys,

SKOR is not good. It took over a year to sell a standard box of Skor at our store. The last bar was eaten by my own family. Each of us did not like it. SKOR was not a good idea.
***
Thank you for contacting The Hershey Company. Your comments about SKOR toffee candy bar are important.

I am sorry that you were disappointed in this product. We realize that consumer taste preferences vary and that not everyone will like every product. I will share your comments with our Marketing Department.

Our goal is to develop products, promotions, and advertising with widespread consumer appeal. It is disappointing to learn that your expectations were not met. Comments such as yours are valuable and provide input into future planning.


Your interest in our company is appreciated.

This email address is restricted for outgoing messages only. For that reason, please do not respond to this email as the inbox is not monitored.

Maria Miller
Consumer Representative

***
Some better feedback would include: We felt that there was too much toffee and not enough chocolate. We do enjoy many of your other products .

Una palabra no dice nada
y al mismo tiempo lo esconde todo
igual que el viento que esconde el agua
como las flores que esconde el lodo.

Una mirada no dice nada
y al mismo tiempo lo dice todo
como la lluvia sobre tu cara
o el viejo mapa de algún tesoro.

Una verdad no dice nada
y al mismo tiempo lo esconde todo
como una hoguera que no se apaga
como una piedra que nace polvo.

Si un día me faltas no seré nada
y al mismo tiempo lo seré todo
porque en tus ojos están mis alas
y está la orilla donde me ahogo,
porque en tus ojos están mis alas
y está la orilla donde me ahogo.

Nice night for the Cleveland Cavaliers. =)

This morning after I brushed my teeth, I dipped my brush in baking soda and gave em a good scrub. Yay for baking soda and shiny teeth. =D

He's got my queen in a head lock

I like the new blue layout. I actually didn't care for the other ones...they were just there to serve a purpose. I think the blue is soothing, and I like coming to the blog. It's also convenient to have links on my sidebar. Hm, i think it's a new place to call "blome"? =P

I got tagged by ummlayth.muslimpad.com , thanks.

So here are the rules:
People who get tagged must write in a blog of their own ten weird things or habits or little known facts as well as state this rule clearly. At the end you must choose six people to be tagged and list their names. No tagbacks!

Only, I haven't thought of the six people yet, so I'll leave that out for now.

10. I took Business Calculus for fun.
9. I can't sleep with my socks on.
8. I've had crushes on fictional/historical characters, including: Batman (cartoon), Thoreau, Mr. Darcy, Holden Caulfield and Donatello (the purple bandana'ed ninja turtle).
7. I type out replies to threads on forums and close them out without posting often.
6. I listen to my cassette player in my car more than my CD player.
5. I always sneeze 3-15 times in a row...always.
4. When talking or listening to people I have a lot of facial expression, and they can tell what I'm thinking. No poker face here.
3. I remember phone numbers from the 2nd grade. That might be my superpower.
2. I like grits.
1. I may be the queen of awkward conversations. Not just conversations that end up being awkward, not the kind with long pauses, stumbling over your words, misunderstandings, or slips of the tongue; but truly awkward combinations of people, perspectives, backgrounds, situations and issues or subjects being talked about. I'd give examples, but that would be a whole new post. By queen, I also do not mean I am good at them...I've just had too many.

More pictures of the ATL aquarium by Editor's request. They have a place where you can touch the stingrays, and sharks...that was really cool. They also have a HUGE wall of glass where its almost like a theatre and you can watch the fish. They have glass ceilings in some areas, so the fish are swimming around you and above you. Those are the Spider Crabs at the bottom...they were huge. SubhanAllah.